Dear Great Pumpkin,
is your friend, Kreature, writing to you. I know it's been a long time since
I last wrote to you, but I'm hoping you can forgive me.
|I always pictured you to be this giant orange blob (no offence to your gourdy body), that was unable to fly through the sky, being guided by your 8 ghosts, dropping presents to all the little boys and girls, even a few grown ups, along the way. But it dawned on me...not a whole lot of people know about you, so flying through the sky would be too obvious! So this is what I think you look like...am I close?|
Well, in any case, I'm laying out a few ground rules this year. The one year you did show up, without my gifts mind you, you totally trashed the place! I had a dilly of a time trying to explain all the pumpkin seeds on the floor and the pumpkin mess you left beside my tv!
Rule #2...no bringing female pumpkins with you! I swear, it looked like either a pumpkin orgy or a pumpkin patch. Bringing human females would be acceptable though, just don't mention it to anyone who's name begins with an "A"
Rule #3...bring your own sheets! Pumpkin stains suck and are hard to get out! And when I mean sheets, I don't mean bringing a hoard of these things...
#4... cats are acceptable for a gift this time around. I've been broken in when
it comes to cats, so as long as they're cute, it's a go. If they look like something
that's been through a washer, forget it! And please, no cats that don't have
fur. Those are scary!
And no tigers or lions or cheetahs or anything that can be found on the plains of Africa. And let's not speak of the panther incident, ok?
you're planning to spend the night, then Rule #5 is for you...
think that's all the rules for now.
* Porche Boxter
* the Stanley Cup
* my own country (preferably somewhere warm)
* non-mad cow diseased beef
* my own tv show
* Britney Spears (just to bug someone!)
* $40 Billion in cash, or Microsoft Corp.
That's the end of the new additions. All of the past entries on my list are still valid and you should feel free to get me those items as well. Incase you misplaced my list, I've included it below.
* a genuine George Bell bat (remember him? It's only been 15 years since I requested this!)
* a rubber duck
* KITT from Knight Rider (remember him? The Knight Industries Two Thousand?)
* Miss Burko (she was hot...way back when I first met her, and considering it was years ago, it's a good bet she's now a Mrs...*sigh*)
* strawberry shortcake (this request was made some 16 years ago, but you know what? It sounds good to me now!)
* love letters from a girl
|Well that's just the first page I found when I went digging through all my old stuff. If I find the rest, before Halloween 2001, I'll add it here. If not, it'll be around for the next year...I just hope you are around too, ok Great Pumpkin???|
|HOME||ABSTRACT MAIN PAGE||COMMENTS|