Saturday, July 3rd, 1999: Hey Compy, another installment of my diary is here!!  Control yourself now, let me finish my entry before you roll your mouse at me ok!  So  what has happened?  Well let's start off by what happened mid-week.  The routine stuff, you know shower and shave...slight mishap though, knicked myself. Yeah, no big like everyone else, put pieces of tissue to stop the bleeding or else I'd pass out from lack of blood.  Oh yeah, streams of blood was gushing out, but that was ok, a little tissue stops everything.  So, put a little here...a little there...somemore here...a touch over there...voila!  Looked in the mirror...yelled out "Good God Man!!"...yeah, I scared myself.  For a minute I thought I was looking at some sort of Egyptian mummy! or Nash the Slash...they're both the same.  NOTE TO SELF:  Seriously consider replacing Compy because he laughs too much at my misfourtune.  Ok Ok, so it wasn't that bad, but I could have lost an eye you know!  Then what would happen?  I'd have to use the internet blind, which isn't too bad since it's hard to find anything worth looking at these days...or is it just me?

Ok, what else...well did the Canada Day celebration thing, which was cool aside from the on and off rain.  Realized why I was booted out of BSB, my singing wasn't so "hot".  Now it's non-existant since I practically blew out my vocal cords and now I sound like Nickstreet Boy...hehe. NOTE TO SELF:  You just opened up yourself to more slamming from some people with that comment.  Why do I always do this?  I must enjoy the abuse I get.  NOTE TO SELF (part 2):  Take out some sort of life insurance...I hear Norwich Union is pretty good because usually you get a phone call from some guy named "Patrick".

So here I am, bad throat and all, can't speak either...what a shame, or so I've been told just before the snickering begins.

Next item of business, this guy comes up to me and says to me "man walks down the street, says 'why am I soft in the middle'...", I just looked the other way and kept on walking!!  Not interested in why he's 'soft in the middle'!  Later realized he was singing a song, 'You Can Call Me Al', which is a pretty good song by Paul Simon, just didn't register with me at that moment.  Glad I didn't make some kind of remark to him and find out he wasn't singing but instead was hoping I could solve his 'softness' problem...whatever that means...I'll leave it at that since I dunno what the heck I'm saying right now.

Oh yeah, just can't stop saying "Good God Man!!!" at everything!  I need help, but it's oh so funny when used right.  Slowly phasing out "Bloody Hell", but I just can't let it completely go.  Another favourite of mine was "Holy Hell", but that sounds corny now...people look at me and wonder what psych ward I just came from.  I just tell them I'm from the "West Wing, room 5b".  And for some reason they say, "ohhhh, makes sense now".  What do they mean by that??
NOTE TO SELF:  Find out what it costs to stay in a psych ward or at least to get a straight jacket...those would be cool to have.

Anything else?...well there was the "cop" incident but I should leave that alone since it was...well, you know!  Right Compy?  NOTE TO SELF:  Compy is alright, he agrees with me for once, now I don't have to actually tell him that the cop incident was nothing more than a cop asking me to make something for him.  Glad I could proudly stand up to him and say..."umm, ok".What's the deal anyways with these cops?  Do they think they rule the world or something?  I mean, if I wanted something made for myself to use at home, I would have to go buy the materials to make it but not a cop.  Oh Mr. Policeman, protect me and I will give you free stuff...well he could just kiss my...  NOTE TO SELF: You made the damn thing for him and he went on his way so stop acting like you stood up to him and told him off!  Just be glad you didn't tell him that what you made could actually act like a lightning rod in a thunderstorm!  I wonder where he is today after the pretty good lightning we had...ha!

Looks like a lot has happened in just one week, well it's only a drop in the bucket...or as I saw at work, it could be a drop on the shoulder from a pigeon...damn birds!  How do you get rid of pigeons without having to clean up the splatterings when using a rifle?  I know it's cruel to kill animals but pigeons aren't animals, they're just flying evilness!!  I think it was a pigeon that tempted Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. NOTE TO SELF:  Rewrite the bible to include the 'real' events...who says Adam and Eve ate forbidden fruit?  They actually tried to watch a tennis match from Wimbledon but it kept on getting rained out so they burned the TV set and...well, as they say, that's where the phrase "TV is root of all evil" began!  It was TV that got Adam and Eve ejected from Eden and awarded a 10 minute misconduct and a game misconduct for having a foot in the crease. NOTE TO SELF (part 2): Do not start eating Oreo cookies like someone I know!!

Well I think that's about it for this installment of...wait, that's how I ended off one of my previous entries I think...yeah, I'm too lazy to scroll down the page to if that's the case but it sure sounds familliar to me.  But who cares right?  I mean it's only Compy reading this and he's just a nobody.  Sd fks wqqi  daef  k;loi  32rasd  iooag i8880asd  gaas ast%8@

OK OK OK....sheesh!!  You try to make a joke and this is what I get!!  I try to say goodbye for now but NO, Compy had to change my sentence to look like something written in Greek...speaking of Greek, hehe, what a funny joke I I dare write it??  What the heck, you only live once and if I get a bounty put on my head then no big loss if I die....yeah, I knew you would agree to that one Compy!  Ok the Greek joke...why do the young Greek boys dress up in dresses?       Answer:  Because the Greek men look for little boys to....well you know the word that fits rhymes with 'puck'.  Hehe, ok so maybe it sounds better out loud but hey, I had a good laugh.  GO LEAFS GO!!  Wait, the season is over...crap, the season was too SHORT!!!

Bye now, I'm off to 99 Queen St. East!!  (it's the mental hospital for those that don't know).